Adventure awaits...

I don't now what day I started asking people how long things were going to take, but at some point I started letting people know if they really wanted to help me, they'd give me some sort of idea how long it would it would take for me to start feeling something close to normal.
How long I was supposed to wait before thinking of going out with friends, or going somewhere alone? When could I have fun, when could I laugh?

No one could answer these questions for me, but I have the answer.

Whenever you do it.

After that trip to Alabama, I came home and went to Washington, D.C..
I had an adventure. For no real reason except I was invited and I wanted to go. My neighbor took me. I made a real friend out of someone who had before only been virtual (and by that I mean I met someone that I formerly didn't know in person, but only via email/text/phone).

I never met an online friend alone before. Everything worked out ok. Choosing to make this trip did something for me that I didn't know would happen. It started things in an upward direction. It reminded me about everything I had put aside because it didn't fit into the "us" that I had become.

The trip was a GREAT decision. Next I started having shellac manicures weekly (that's really too often so if you're going to do it, stretch it out to every two weeks). Those just boosted my self confidence, but it started to make the people at work think I was slipping. But hey, I needed something and no one there was asking me to do anything... the only other activity I had was my neighbor Scruggins was working me like a freaking slave to change my home surroundings. (This was a good idea which eventually led to a BAD outcome but more on that later...).

People thought I was crazy, I have known people who were widowed and they did things I thought were "crazy" as well. Rest assured no matter how your spouse dies, some things you are going to want to do or actually do will make people question your sanity.

Know this: People all grieve in different ways
You will find out who is really your friend when you go through a loss like this
Not everyone you think will give you the support you expect
You can make it
You will become whomever you will yourself to become

I decided I needed to call upon the powers of my girlhood champion and embody her.
I decided to become: Wonder Woman